A Second Language Perspective on Immigrant Assimilation

by | May 1, 2020 | language learning, refugees |

I have often had people tell me that they wished immigrants and those with English as their second language were much more engaged with the broader American community. Typically that desire comes with a small token comment of, “but I know the language must be difficult.” Those who have learned a second language are really the only ones who can speak into that difficulty with any legitimacy or understanding.

I have worked very hard over many years to learn Nepali, stay fresh with the language, and pass that language on to my son. He was born in Nepal and I want him to appreciate where he came from and be able to understand older adults in the Nepali community where we live. Though I can have most conversations with relative ease, I would be dishonest if I ignored how challenging some forms of engagement actually are. Both entering into a exclusively Nepali group where I am the minority or interacting through writing is tough.

Nepalis are warm people and I am welcomed into most groups with open arms. Food is set before me. Smiles are given. Invitations to come back are offered. When you are the only minority in a group of first language speakers though, it is sort of an overwhelming experience when rapid-fire conversations happen all around you. Even if you have intermediate to advanced language skills, the conversation moves so fast on a variety of topics that it can be hard to keep up. Put me one on one with any Nepali on the planet and I am bound to have a meaningful discussion. Put me into a conversation with 10 Nepalis where comments are bouncing here, there, and everywhere and I may be a phrase behind every time. That is not ideal and it makes for lots of stress.

Nepali has a script that I have never been able to learn because few resources existed in braille for me. This has meant that I have learned almost the entirety of the language by hearing and phonetically writing things down.

I do not have the privilege of all the non-verbals that are helpful to pull you along in the early days of learning a language. I either understand it or I don’t. 

Several times a month I will get a message from someone through text or Facebook messenger that is written in Nepali. Sometimes that is written in the Nepali script and sometimes that script is turned into English characters and typed out (I have text to speech technology that can read both).  Because writing is not something I do often in the language nor do many blind resources exist, I feel pretty inferior and hesitant to write in Nepali. Still though, friends ask me questions. They text me. They write a Facebook question. They want me to engage with their culture. I typically muster up the enthusiasm to respond in the best way I can but it does not come easy.

I share all this to say that having a desire for first generation immigrants to engage and assimilate to American culture isn’t as easy as the flip of a switch. I have had countless Nepalis lament at the fact that their English is not better. Many parents do not like it that their kids English has quickly surpassed their own level; it feels more dignifying to not attend a parent teacher conference than to attend with an interpreter. All these things add up and become rather exhausting. This is not to say that thousands of second language speakers disengage. I engage. Many of my Nepali friends who hold English as a second language engage. We engage though at a high cost of mental and emotional exhaustion. Thinking in another language is no easy task.

Here are a few tips and suggestions I will offer from my experience:

  1. Don’t assume that we are all at the same level or our second language experiences are the same. This is a huge spectrum and some people’s ability to engage will be easier than others.
  2. Find out if the second language speaker is better with speaking or writing. Based upon what you find out, then communicate accordingly. Many Nepalis I know are not that comfortable in writing in either language (Nepali or English) so we trade a lot of voice recordings back and forth.
  3. Go into a room where you are the only English speaker. Try to engage. Write down what you feel or how your experience was. Remember that the next time you desire your second language speaking friends to plunge right in.
  4. If you are a church person try to get one on one with the second language speaker. If they have ventured into an English speaking environment, they likely have some English skills. Being in the big group though may be overwhelming and a bit much to swallow.
  5. Assimilation is a loaded word. Answer to yourself what you mean by assimilation. No missionary I know has ever completely given up their own culture or language when they move to a different country. We should not expect immigrants to completely give that up either. Remember that we are a nation of immigrants and true assimilation means that we all change. The majority culture adapts. The immigrant culture adapts. We must meet in the middle. Redefine assimilation and see where you land.

I share all this not to rid ourselves of the challenges or ignore that there are real issues when it comes to assimilation. Missionary ghettos exist. I have met missionaries who have lived in a culture for 20 years without learning the local language. I have met immigrants who have lived in the US for just as long who are no better. For every bad example though, there are wonderful examples of assimilation and attempts to move closer to the middle. May we be ever so careful to understand why the language or assimilation process is slow. 

None of this is easy. I wouldn’t be writing about it if it was. The journey is long but there is a beautiful life to be lived together if we learn to dance the dance well.